(Adverbs) – “The Perfect Couple”

“The Perfect Couple” – Adverbs exercise

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In the “Change/Add Adverbs” exercise, the aim is to make the text more expressive and descriptive. In this instance, by adding some adverbs or changing the ones that are already there.

The text comes from real-world examples in books, articles, websites etc.

This exercise will change the depth and tone by adding to the basic structure of the text. We aim to keep the same basic meaning, however.

Example:


“We cycled quickly to get to the concert. We loved their music. They played so well, I was truly moved. Wrapped in this feeling of sweet serenity, we cycled home.”

By changing and adding adverbs, this could also be expressed as:

“We cycled furiously to get to the concert. We absolutely loved their music. They played so majestically, I was truly moved. Wrapped in this feeling of sweet serenity, we cycled peacefully all the way home.”

You will notice how the tone changes slightly: ‘cycled furiously’ gives a feeling of real effort to move quickly; ‘absolutely loved’ increases the amount of feeling they have for the music; ‘cycled peacefully’ gives a description that wasn’t present in the original text.

You can submit your work to the comments section just below (click on a speech bubble). The teacher chooses certain pieces to correct, re-write or make comments. Students can too.

Click on the numbers to quickly go to excerpts 1, 2 or 3.
Go to Excerpt

Excerpt 1
It was the silence I noticed first. When Danny was around there was always noise, singing or humming, the tap-tapping of a lap-top keyboard, the prolonged clatter of spoon against ceramic mug as he stirred his black coffee vigorously for far too long, in my view, for a man who didn't even take sugar in it - what was he stirring?

Excerpt 1:
It was the silence I quickly noticed at first. When Danny was around there was always noise, enthusiastically singing or sonorously humming, the merry tap-tapping of a lap-top keyboard, the prolonged clatter of spoon against ceramic mug as he earnestly stirred his black coffee for far too long, in my view, for a man who didn’t even ever take sugar in it – what was he violently stirring?

Now you try!
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Please rewrite excerpt 1x

Write your own example, if you would like. Click on the "Speech Bubble" button above to begin. A reply box will open up for you to enter your response.
You'll find all student work and responses for this lesson in the comment section at the bottom of the page.
When students contribute their work, a better lesson is built.

Excerpt 2
No sign of any fresh food. He hadn't even gone shopping? What was going on? Had something happened at work, delaying him? He'd told me he'd be finishing at lunchtime that day, for once, that he'd have plenty of time to do the supermarket run for a change, save me doing it on Saturday morning as I usually did, while he stayed at home to run the vacuum round and flick a duster over the shelves.

Excerpt 2:
No sign of any fresh food. He hadn’t even gone shopping? What was going on? Had something happened at work, mysteriously delaying him? He’d told me when he’d scarcely finished at lunchtime that day, he’d have plenty of time, for once, to do the supermarket run for a change, approvingly saving me from doing it on Saturday morning as I usually did, while he was compelled to stay at home to fastidiously run the vacuum round and rhythmically flick a duster over the shelves.

Please join in by sharing your work.
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Please rewrite excerpt 2x

Click on the "Speech Bubble" button. Your efforts are appreciated.

Excerpt 3
'Holy cow. It's like looking at brothers. Coincidence, or not? What do you make of that, guy?' Detective Sergeant Devon Clarke glanced over his shoulder. Behind him, Detective Chief Inspector Helena Dickens nodded slowly, indigo eyes fixed on the two photos on the board. 'I dunno. Not yet, anyway. But yes, they do look spookily similar. Weird, eh?'

Excerpt 3:
'Holy cow. It’s genuinely like looking at brothers. Coincidence, or not? What do you make of that, guy?' Detective Sergeant Devon Clarke furtively glanced over his shoulder. Behind him, Detective Chief Inspector Helena Dickens nodded intently, indigo eyes keenly fixed on the two photos on the board. 'I dunno. Not yet, anyway. But yes, they do look spookily similar. Weird, eh?'

Join in!
0
Please rewrite excerpt 3x

You can improve the lesson by sharing your work. Click on the "Speech Bubble" button. We would love your support.

When students have submitted work, the teacher will choose examples to show here along with corrections and suggestions.




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