(Adjectives) – “The Perfect Couple”
Created using images from: Pexels.com – RODNAE Productions.
In the “Change/Add Adjectives” exercise, the aim is to make the text more expressive and descriptive. In this instance, by adding some adjectives or changing the ones that are already there.
The text comes from real-world examples in books, articles, websites etc.
This exercise will change the depth and tone by adding to the basic structure of the text. We aim to keep the same basic meaning, however.
Example:
"The wind blew onto my neck. The taste of sea air filled my mouth. The waves crashed and swelled on the beach."
By changing and adding adjectives, this could also be expressed as:
"The cold wind blew onto my bare neck. The salty taste of sea air filled my mouth, unwelcomed. The waves crashed and swelled onto the usually sun-kissed beach like spilt jellies."
You will notice how the tone changes slightly: ‘bare neck’ gives an added sense of feeling the cold; ‘salty taste’ and ‘unwelcomed’ describes a specific taste the person doesn’t like; ‘usually sun-kissed beach’ shows that the weather is frequently very warm, but not today; the figurative speech: ‘like spilt jellies’ gives an image of the type of waves and how they are acting.
You can submit your work to the comments section just below (click on a speech bubble). The teacher chooses certain pieces to correct, re-write or make comments. Students can too.
Excerpt 1
It was the silence I noticed first. When Danny was around there was always noise, singing or humming, the tap-tapping of a lap-top keyboard, the prolonged clatter of spoon against ceramic mug as he stirred his black coffee vigorously for far too long, in my view, for a man who didn't even take sugar in it - what was he stirring?
Excerpt 1:
It was the stark silence I noticed first. When Danny was around there was always vibrant noise, singing or humming, the tap-tapping of a lap-top keyboard, the incessant clatter of an eager spoon against a cheery ceramic mug as he stirred his rich black coffee vigorously for far too long, in my humble view, for a sweet man who didn’t even take sugar in it – what was he stirring?
Your turn now!
Write your own example, if you would like. Click on the "Speech Bubble" button above to begin. A reply box will open up for you to enter your response.
You'll find all student work and responses for this lesson in the comment section at the bottom of the page.
When students contribute their work, a better lesson is built.
No sign of any fresh food. He hadn't even gone shopping? What was going on? Had something happened at work, delaying him? He'd told me he'd be finishing at lunchtime that day, for once, that he'd have plenty of time to do the supermarket run for a change, save me doing it on Saturday morning as I usually did, while he stayed at home to run the vacuum round and flick a duster over the shelves.
Excerpt 2:
No particular sign of any fresh food. He hadn’t even gone shopping? What was going on? Had something happened at work, delaying him? He’d told me he’d be finishing at lunchtime that day, for once, that he’d have oodles of time to do the supermarket run for a change, save me doing it on Saturday morning as I normally did, while he stayed at home to run the hungry vacuum round and flick a careful duster over the shelves.
Click on the "Speech Bubble" button. Your contributions are appreciated.
Excerpt 3
'Holy cow. It's like looking at brothers. Coincidence, or not? What do you make of that, guy?' Detective Sergeant Devon Clarke glanced over his shoulder. Behind him, Detective Chief Inspector Helena Dickens nodded slowly, indigo eyes fixed on the two photos on the board. 'I dunno. Not yet, anyway. But yes, they do look spookily similar. Weird, eh?'
Excerpt 3:
'Holy cow. It’s like looking at twin brothers. Uncanny coincidence, or not? What do you make of that, guy?' Detective Sergeant Devon Clarke glanced over his big broad shoulders. Behind him, Detective Chief Inspector Helena Dickens nodded slowly, piercing indigo eyes fixed on the two glossy photos on the board of unsolved crime. 'I dunno. Not yet, anyway. But yes, they do look eerily similar. Odd, huh?'
Click on the "Speech Bubble" button. We would love your assistance.
When students have submitted work, the teacher will choose examples to show here along with corrections and suggestions.